It's confirmed, Nolan's going to have a little sis! I saw the ultrasound today and this girl moves a lot. I started to feel her moving 3 weeks ago and now she won't stop! Every night, before going to bed she kicks me and I just stand there to feel her... I'm so happy!!
Lawton will be surprised, he did not feel her moving yet... he's coming home tomorrow, I miss him a lot. I realize that each year my love for him changed, it has grown more and getting deeper... 4 years!
This time he was in Malawi was a good time for me to pray and rely on God so much more.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Friday, May 7, 2010
Papai is in Lali (Malawi)
Lawton left to Malawi a week ago and Nolan and I stayed how to support him in prayers. It was sad to see him go and Nolan knew he was leaving as we said goodbye at the airport.
We receive updates from Epicentre and that's how we know how he's doing. All the details are in the email and I get really excited to see how the team is doing. It's really amazing how God has been working in this process, not only in the Yao people but on the team itself.
Lawton has been amazing, I'm just so proud of him stepping out to go and have the chance to see God's work. I'm sure it's not simple but I'm sure every little bit counts, even if it would count just for one person. God has been working in our life so much through ETS, we so much want to be part of His work and his kingdom as a family, more than ever.
Personally, I am able to worship more freely because it is all for Him. Also, I have a deeper understanding of his purposes and his ways, even though I don't understand it completely, I am able to accept and continue to follow Jesus.
When I ask Nolan where is papai, he says he is in "Lali". This little guy has been growing fast, 2 days ago I was singing him "Jesus is beautiful" and he would say the words and the rythm, so cute that i had tears in my eyes when I heard him singing.
Baby #2 has been growing fast too, can't miss the belly poking out... and since 2 weeks ago, I started to feel movement, first very tiny and weak, now it's strong especially at night. Lawton hasn't felt that yet.
This sunday will be mother's day and my dear husband was thoughtful enough to send me, my mom and his mom flowers... I was touched. I miss him...
We receive updates from Epicentre and that's how we know how he's doing. All the details are in the email and I get really excited to see how the team is doing. It's really amazing how God has been working in this process, not only in the Yao people but on the team itself.
Lawton has been amazing, I'm just so proud of him stepping out to go and have the chance to see God's work. I'm sure it's not simple but I'm sure every little bit counts, even if it would count just for one person. God has been working in our life so much through ETS, we so much want to be part of His work and his kingdom as a family, more than ever.
Personally, I am able to worship more freely because it is all for Him. Also, I have a deeper understanding of his purposes and his ways, even though I don't understand it completely, I am able to accept and continue to follow Jesus.
When I ask Nolan where is papai, he says he is in "Lali". This little guy has been growing fast, 2 days ago I was singing him "Jesus is beautiful" and he would say the words and the rythm, so cute that i had tears in my eyes when I heard him singing.
Baby #2 has been growing fast too, can't miss the belly poking out... and since 2 weeks ago, I started to feel movement, first very tiny and weak, now it's strong especially at night. Lawton hasn't felt that yet.
This sunday will be mother's day and my dear husband was thoughtful enough to send me, my mom and his mom flowers... I was touched. I miss him...
Friday, March 26, 2010
Papai's heart surgery
Right now papai is having a heart bypass surgery at Huntington hospital. A few days ago, we rushed him to the ER, due to chest pain... it has been a long and difficult process but we see how God protected and orchestrated each path of this process.
Not only just these few days but even before papai came. God is faithful, these past few days we were constantly praying for God's miracle to happen and so that papai could see His love in a tangible and real way. He did, and for the first time in my life I see my father owning his faith. And i got to experience God's people surrounding us with His love...
I was touched when some of my friends and my pastor (Lawrence) came to see papai and he was telling them what happened. He had teary eyes when he mentioned how he cried out to Him for help and how he answered. Today just before the surgery my pastor came again and led papai in a prayer time by saying Psalm 23 out loud with my mom citing it, really sweet to see that divine time with God as a couple.
Mamae and I are talking of just how much God had blessed and took care of papai, even when we did not see it.
Nolan misses Acon a lot, he keeps on asking about him and then he says: "Acon, pray pray?" So cute to see our little one having an idea of praying and feeling his presence. The other day, he said Sammie (Nolan's friend) out of the blue, and I wondered why he said his name. I then find out that she was out of town with mommy and feeling very homesick. He wanted to pray for her!! : )
Baby has been good, today we had a more detailed ultrasound and saw the little one moving a lot in my tummy. The baby waved at us, we could see the little hand and fingers and legs... cute!!
Not only just these few days but even before papai came. God is faithful, these past few days we were constantly praying for God's miracle to happen and so that papai could see His love in a tangible and real way. He did, and for the first time in my life I see my father owning his faith. And i got to experience God's people surrounding us with His love...
I was touched when some of my friends and my pastor (Lawrence) came to see papai and he was telling them what happened. He had teary eyes when he mentioned how he cried out to Him for help and how he answered. Today just before the surgery my pastor came again and led papai in a prayer time by saying Psalm 23 out loud with my mom citing it, really sweet to see that divine time with God as a couple.
Mamae and I are talking of just how much God had blessed and took care of papai, even when we did not see it.
Nolan misses Acon a lot, he keeps on asking about him and then he says: "Acon, pray pray?" So cute to see our little one having an idea of praying and feeling his presence. The other day, he said Sammie (Nolan's friend) out of the blue, and I wondered why he said his name. I then find out that she was out of town with mommy and feeling very homesick. He wanted to pray for her!! : )
Baby has been good, today we had a more detailed ultrasound and saw the little one moving a lot in my tummy. The baby waved at us, we could see the little hand and fingers and legs... cute!!
Thursday, December 3, 2009
My little companion
I told Nolan today that he's my little companion. As the days go by and we spend time together I can see how our relationship has grown and how we love each other's company. It's really cute
For the past 2 weeks, Lawton got the chance to take care of Nolan by himself. I think it is the first time ever that he has done that and I'm so proud of him. He took Nolan to the park, fed him, bathe him, took care of the house, cooked dinner and did groceries shopping. These days they Nolan was papai's companion... I'm so happy to see them connect, it is really special to see the special bond that they have with each other, really cute! Lawton took this picture in one of their outings, at a coffe shop.
For the past 2 weeks, Lawton got the chance to take care of Nolan by himself. I think it is the first time ever that he has done that and I'm so proud of him. He took Nolan to the park, fed him, bathe him, took care of the house, cooked dinner and did groceries shopping. These days they Nolan was papai's companion... I'm so happy to see them connect, it is really special to see the special bond that they have with each other, really cute! Lawton took this picture in one of their outings, at a coffe shop.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
ETS
Last month, we started going to ETS (Epicentre trainning school). It was a process to go through, I knew the sacrifices that would be necessary (time and energy, Nolan's sleeping deprivation, etc.) but Lawton and I realized that it would be a unique moment that we would be closer to God and see Him in so many different ways.
I've been praying for this, for about a year, I commited to pray for Lawton's faith to grow as a spiritual leader in the family. Now I realized the prayer was also for my own walk with God. Lawton decided to do the ETS before me, I was a bit hesitant thinking about the commitment necessary.
But I know that God has so many ways to reach to us and extend his love. One of the speakers (Floyd Mcclung) preached about the prodigal son. He said he thinks that this boy had a broken spirit, so much pain to be leaving his house in the search for something else outside.
This made me reflect about the miscarriage and how much pain I still feel and how I also feel like running away. But God demonstrated his love to me in this story, how He wants to reach that deep pain and comfort me. Just like the son, in the mist of desperation, remembered his father's love for him, I also remembered the love of the Father for me. He wants to restore my heart so that I can trust Him again and that it takes faith to know He will come through and heal me.
It's a process, I know it will take a while to heal the pain and disappointment. But to know that God loves me and He wants to speak to me, encourage me, tell me that he will never leave me, He's trustworthy, he will heal me because that will allow a transparent relationship with the Father.
I've been praying for this, for about a year, I commited to pray for Lawton's faith to grow as a spiritual leader in the family. Now I realized the prayer was also for my own walk with God. Lawton decided to do the ETS before me, I was a bit hesitant thinking about the commitment necessary.
But I know that God has so many ways to reach to us and extend his love. One of the speakers (Floyd Mcclung) preached about the prodigal son. He said he thinks that this boy had a broken spirit, so much pain to be leaving his house in the search for something else outside.
This made me reflect about the miscarriage and how much pain I still feel and how I also feel like running away. But God demonstrated his love to me in this story, how He wants to reach that deep pain and comfort me. Just like the son, in the mist of desperation, remembered his father's love for him, I also remembered the love of the Father for me. He wants to restore my heart so that I can trust Him again and that it takes faith to know He will come through and heal me.
It's a process, I know it will take a while to heal the pain and disappointment. But to know that God loves me and He wants to speak to me, encourage me, tell me that he will never leave me, He's trustworthy, he will heal me because that will allow a transparent relationship with the Father.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
30 words
Is that a milestone? Our little Nolan can speak 30 words, all mixed up english, portuguese and cantonese! What a boy... some of them are: clock, airplane, apple, abre, coco, peixe, carro, tje-tje. Isn't my little one amazing? : )
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Psalm 139:7-8
Who would know that a one of Nolan's CD song would help me to go through this difficult time. When we found out about my miscarriage, I had this song in my mind:
Where can I go from your spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence, oh Lord
If I go up to the heavens, you're there
If I make my bed in the depths, you're there
Where's God?
Everywhere
Where's God?
Everywhere
God is everywhere
Psalm 139:7-8
It reminded me that anywhere I am, his presence is certain and it will help me go through anything.
Where can I go from your spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence, oh Lord
If I go up to the heavens, you're there
If I make my bed in the depths, you're there
Where's God?
Everywhere
Where's God?
Everywhere
God is everywhere
Psalm 139:7-8
It reminded me that anywhere I am, his presence is certain and it will help me go through anything.
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